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Boeing Aerospace Customer Satisfaction Survey

May 1st, 2014 | No Comments

Please fill out and mail this card within 10 days of purchase

Thank you for purchasing a Boeing military aircraft. In order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering the survey questions is not required, but the information will help us to develop new products that best meet your needs and desires.

1. _Mr. _Mrs. _Ms. _Miss _Lt. _Gen. _Comrade _Classified _Other

First Name____________________Initial____Last
Name_________________________

Latitude________________________Longitude_________ _________________________

Altitude________________________Password, Code Name, Etc.__________________

2. Which model aircraft did you purchase?

_F-14 Tomcat _F-15 Eagle _F-16 Falcon _F-119A Stealth _Classified

3. Date of purchase:

Month___________Day___________Year____________

4. Serial Number___________________

5. Please check where this product was purchased:Received as Gift/Aid Package

Catalog Showroom
Sleazy Arms Broker
Mail Order
Discount Store
Government Surplus
Hijacked it using one of our spies
Classified

6. Please check how you became aware of the Boeing product you have just purchased:

Store Display
Heard loud noise, looked up
Espionage
Recommended by friend/relative/ally
Political lobbying by Manufacturer
Was attacked by one
Was bombed by one

7. Please check the three (3) factors which most influenced your decision to purchase this Boeing product:Style/Appearance

Kickback/Bribe
Recommended by salesperson
Speed/Maneuverability
Comfort/Convenience
Boeing Reputation
Advanced Weapons Systems
Price/Value
Back-Room Politics
Negative experience opposing one in combat

8. Please check the location(s) where this product will be used:

Latin America
Iraq
South America
Iraq
Aircraft Carrier
Iraq
Europe
Iraq
Middle East (Esp. Iraq)
Africa
Iraq
Asia/Far East
Iraq
Misc. Third-World Countries
Iraq
Classified
Iraq

9. Please check the products that you currently own, or intend to purchase in the near future:

Product Own/Intend to purchase

ICBM
Killer Satellite
Air-to-Air Missiles
Space Shuttle
Nuclear Weapon
Hydrogen/Neutron Bomb
Light Sabre
X-Wing Fighter
Millenium Falcon
Imperial Star Destroyer
Death Star

10. How would you describe yourself or your organization? Check all
that apply:

Communist/Socialist
Terrorist
Islamic Fundamentalist
Zionist
Nazi
Neutral
Democratic
Dictatorship
Corrupt (Latin American)
Corrupt (Other)
Primitive/Tribal

11. How did you pay for your Boeing product?

Cash
Suitcases of Cocaine
Oil Revenues
Deficit Spending
Personal Check
Credit Card
Ransom Money
Traveller’s Check
Swiss bank account transactions
Counterfeit $100 bills

12. Occupation

Revolutionary
Clerical
Mercenary
Tyrant
Corporate CEO
Dictator
Oil Billionaire
Drug Lord
Defense Minister/General
Retired
Student

13. To help us understand our Customers’ lifestyles, please indicate the interests and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy participating on a regular basis:

Activity/Interests

Sabotage
Propaganda/Disinformation
Destabilizing/Overthrow
Bankruptcy
Industrial Espionage
Black Market/Smuggling
Interrogation/Torture
Crushing Rebellions
Military Reconnaissance
Border Disputes
Mutually Assured Destruction
Sex Trade
Golf

Thanks for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your answers will be used in market studies that will help Boeing serve you better in the future — as well as allowing you to receive mailings and special offers from other companies, governments, extremist groups, and mysterious consortia.

Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please write to:

Boeing Corporation
Marketing Department
Military Aerospace Division
P.O. Box 800
St. Louis, MO 55500

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Legal Businesses Face Government Oppression

April 30th, 2014 | No Comments

There’s no other way to put it: this is official state oppression. The DOJ (Department of Justice) has taken upon itself the role of Morality Police. Without the backing of Congressional legislation, or even bureaucratic regulation, they are systematically forcing banks to close the accounts of those conducting lawful business that they don’t approve of.

It’s called Operation Choke Point, and it has nothing to do with deep-throating.

Instead, it’s a targeted effort to shut down as many as 30 separate industries by making it impossible for them to access banking services.

In a Wall Street Journal op-ed Thursday, American Bankers Association CEO Frank Keating wrote that the Justice Department is “telling bankers to behave like policemen and judges.”

“Operation Choke Point is asking banks to identify customers who may be breaking the law or simply doing something government officials don’t like,” Keating wrote. “Banks must then ‘choke off’ those customers’ access to financial services, shutting down their accounts.”

Keating said the highly secretive operation was launched in early 2013. That’s when porn stars started to complain to the media that their bank accounts were being shut down without explanation.

The adult entertainment industry isn’t the only one being targeted. There are 30 different industries being targeted by the DOJ and FDIC, including ammunition vendors and firearm dealers.

The Tolerance of Progressives

April 29th, 2014 | No Comments

So good to see Progressives, and Democrats in particular, continuing to uphold their tradition of openness and inclusiveness.

DeMaio has been the target of homophobic attacks. But where are those attacks coming from? It’s not always from the far right social conservatives you’d expect; rather, it’s been from DeMaio’s left – the liberal and Democrat-affiliated groups that you’d think would be proud that an openly gay successful businessman has decided to run for office.

One false attack drew the attention of the San Diego Ethics Commission. An anonymous left-wing group funded a SuperPac and sent mailers of DeMaio Photoshopped next to a drag queen to neighborhoods with a majority of elderly and African-American voters, knowing that such a photo would depress support for DeMaio.

That was so egregious and false that the group was fined by the city’s Ethics Commission, but even after that, and with his 100 percent voting record with the LGBT community, the Left still didn’t speak up to defend him. They told DeMaio, “It’s complicated.”

I’m sure. The Right, on the other hand, did speak up about it.

“I’ve found more tolerance, acceptance and inclusion from social conservative groups who have to reconcile that I’m a Republican who happens to be gay…versus the intolerance the LGBT leaders see me as a gay man who happens to be a Republican,” DeMaio said.

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QOTD

November 1st, 2012 | No Comments

“Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you.

When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are.

The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face.

In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end.

Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.”

~Bob Marley

The Headache Song

October 5th, 2012 | No Comments

To the tune of Simon and Garfunkel’s The Sound of Silence

Hello headache, my old friend
I’ve come to talk with you again
Because a migraine softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was sleeping
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within a pounding headache

In restless dreams I walked alone
Hoping my neurons would atone
‘Neath the halo of bedside lamp
I pulled my bedsheet ‘gainst the cold and damp
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of blinding light
That split the night
Within a pounding headache

And in the naked light I saw
Ten thousand people maybe more
People talking without speaking
People hearing without listening
People writing songs that voices never shared
No one dared
Relieve a pounding headache

“Fools,” said I, “you do not know
Headaches like a cancer grows
Hear my words that I might teach you
Take Advil that I might reach you”
But the drugs like silent raindrops fail
To relieve a pounding headache

And the people bowed and prayed
Ibuprofen gods they made
And the sign flashed out its warning
In the words that it was forming
And the sign said “The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
And tenement halls
Have some relief, for your headache

Feel free to share this all you want, just throw me a link back here. Thanks ;-)

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