Al Queda Claims Responsibility for Hurricane Isabel

by Azreel | September 20th, 2003

Al Queda, Friday, announced that they were responsible for Hurricane Isabel hitting the eastern seaboard of the United States. Friday morning, as many as 5 million were without electricity, and floods from the heavy downpours ravaged areas of Virginia, Maryland, and North Carolina.

“It is the will of Allah” said spokesman Hassan Karim Fallujah Mohammed Safir. “The US infidels will pay for their sins. Allah and his Prophet Mohammed have sent this storm as a strike against the unholy Americans. And we shut down Washington DC for an entire day! Now the evil Bush will know we are a force to be reckoned with.”

Casualty reports are sketchy still, but Virginia, North Carolina, and parts of Maryland have been declared federal disaster areas as a result of the Catergory 2 hurricane. As much as 16 inches of rain fell in parts of the West Virginia. Residents in severely flooded portions of Cape Hatteras North Carolina likened the flood to accounts of a great deluge in Genesis.
“I feel a bit like Noah” commented pig farmer Jebediah Holmes “Except all the pigs are on the roof of the barn, and I don’t have a big Ark”
All goverment buildings in Washington DC were shut down Thursday. Friday morning, approximately 30% of the city was without power, and traffic lights throughout the city were not functioning. Wind gusts reportedly topped 40 mph, taking off small tree limbs in some areas.

The national guard was called in to help combat damage from the storm. Guardsmen directed traffic in Washington DC and dispensed ice and water to evacuated residents in areas of Virgina and North Carolina.

Secretary of Homeland Security Tom Ridge toured the devastated area by helicopter.
“We have to support the people in this area” he told reporters after his helicopter tour “This area has certainly seen some severe damage. Now is when we must pull together.”

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